Anybody want to take my place? Braves 1, Dinky Birds 14

Seriously, if anybody wants to take my place on Monday recaps, please do. You can’t produce worse results than I have this year.

I know, “regression to the mean,” “law of averages,” etc. etc. but when a team scores 3 runs in 4 games and has a fairly objectively craptastic lineup, you don’t figure they will explode for 14 runs. But then again, the new flexible plastic explosive, TT 10, can create massive explosions. My heart goes out for M. Toussaint. He seems like a good guy. He seems to work hard. He just can’t get a handle on where the ball is going. He may be scarred for life. However, he doesn’t need to be on Major League roster again this year absent mass injuries.

Through 2 innings you squint and say ‘maybe Touki can turn a corner, kind of like Wright may be doing.” Yeah, he turned a corner and entered Tiananmen Square facing squarely a tank. The 3rd inning goes down as one of the worst pitching performances I have ever heard of. Walk, Stolen base, single, homer, homer (mound visit),d single, groundout, walk, pop out (now there are 2 outs, maybeeee), error, walk, (pitching change to merely ordinary combustible item, Luke Jackson), single, homer, pop out.

Meanwhile, the legendary bats slept their way through the game. A (bad) career reliever starts the game with an ERA around 7 and puts up a 1.000 WHIP. Really???

I had about 3 positive recap ideas before the game. The best was a song recap based on McCartney and Wings “Rock Show.” “watch the ball go, at the home of Orioles.” “courtesy of Monsieur Touki (touki, touki).” But, the stunning nature of this collapse killed any positive vibes I could get.

Alright Hammers, turn these Birds into nails and drive them, harshly and with due prejudice. Staring tonight with the Boxcar Wino. Yeah, like that is really going to work out well.

18 thoughts on “Anybody want to take my place? Braves 1, Dinky Birds 14”

  1. A few notes on Pablo Sandoval:
    •He was in the org prior to 9/15, the playoffs cutoff date, so he’s eligible for the postseason.
    •He has a higher average exit velocity than Ronald Acuna Jr. at 91.2 MPH (his highest in the Statcast era dating back to 2015).
    •His hard hit rate is in the top 10% of the league
    •His BABIP is well below league average, likely due to the lack of launch angle and that he’s carrying a lot of extra weight.

    If Seitzer can work with him and get his swing adjusted to create more lift, he could be a ton of fun.

  2. Count me in on Pablo Sandoval. The Braves Way has frequently allowed for the rostering of athletic oddities — the very old, the very young, knuckleballers, spitballers, Ryan Klesko. Panda will only add to this rich tapestry.

  3. @6, you’ve talked me into it. What the hell, he can’t be more useless than Jesse Garcia.

  4. @9
    Other than what’s been leaked from camp which is that he’s behind others. Someone on Twitter suggested it, but maybe with all the early promotions they’ve made in the past, the Braves are slow playing Muller and Davidson.

  5. Big news that the WC, LDS and LCS will all have no off days. While that stinks for ATL this year given the lack of rotation depth, I frankly love it and think they should keep that format in future years.

    It always stunk to go against an ace 3 times in a 7 game series, which is so different from regular season baseball. Just last year the Nats showed you can basically win the WS with 3 pitchers. I like that the 4th and possibly 5th starter may be relevant.

  6. @12

    I couldn’t disagree more, and in any case, it’s pretty wretched news for us. But generally speaking, the solution to making something more compelling is not to force the crappy players into the spotlight.

  7. I will add this is all the more reason to see what Davidson, Muller or even De La Cruz look like in the last couple of weeks. Who else is excited for potential game 5 starter, Huascar Ynoa?

  8. I understand wanting to see the stars play in the postseason, I just happen to prefer that the postseason has at least some semblance of the (typically) 162 game season. I always have hated that the MLB postseason was such a different animal than the regular season. With all of the off days, teams with the best ace are at too great an advantage.

    I think of all of those years from 91-05 that ATL had 4 or 5 good to great starters but the 4th and 5th starter were made obsolete.

  9. For fun, the last 2 years the following have started playoff games for ATL:

    Folty (4)
    Keuchel (2)
    Newcomb (1)
    A Sanchez (1)
    Soroka (1)

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