Welcome to “Phake News,” the most accurate Philadelphia Phillies based reporting most of you will read today, probably.
While we await the Phillies Sunday evening game in Williamsport, home of the Little League World Series, we can already report that our so-called competitors, the Braves, have collapsed into a first place tie in the division. The Braves have now lost 8 of their last 20, and are fading fast.
Today’s culprits include Ronald Acuna Jr., who failed to lead off the game by getting on base, and Ozzie Albies, who has struggled this season to the tune of a .277 batting average and 21 home runs. The Braves have stupidly entrusted 2 line up spots to 2 of the youngest players in the league, and it will surely be their downfall. It does not speak well of the Braves veterans that these youngsters are 3rd and 1st on the team in home runs, respectively.
The Phillies will undoubtedly be huge favorites this evening in Williamsport, as we are already experienced at playing all of our home games in a Little League stadium. If only it was not the Mets…
The Braves come to Pittsburgh Monday, if they dare to even enter into the same Commonwealth as the Phillies juggernaut.
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