127 thoughts on “Oh, great, now we’ve made them mad game thread: May 9, Braves at Phillies”

  1. @1, Bobby Cox was like “How the hell did we win last night?? Let’s see them try to win with THIS lineup! Muh hahaha!”

  2. On the plus side, it looks like there will be plenty of pinch hitters available for when Kawakami has to come out in the fifth inning.

  3. Hinske is completely useless against LHP. Not that half the line up isn’t also useless against LHP (or RHP), but I understand why he’d sit Hinske.

  4. Well, at least he’s sitting in favor of Melky, who is capable of sucking from both sides of the plate.

  5. Strained groin for Chipper. Guess he saw Heyward’s sweet deal and decided he had to get him some of that.

  6. I suppose its possible Chipper REALLY is hurting, and maybe cant play, but I suppose thats just cynicism on my part.

  7. This may be a new low for Bobby. Conrad at third? Melky batting third?

    I … just … Good luck, KK!

  8. Also notable is how awful McLouth has become: how can anyone possibly bat 8th in that lineup and still look himself in the mirror?

  9. i was going to stick around and watch this game but after seeing this lineup, i’ve decided to stick my head in the oven instead.

  10. If Kawakami hasn’t developed a complex after today, he’s got a stronger mental fortitude than most. It’s like fate is determined not to let him get a win this year.

  11. I’m now convinced that Cox has lost it. Melky batting third? Hinske is out of the lineup after coming up with that big double yesterday? This is ridiculous!! I’m sure the rest of league already considers our offense a laughing stock, but this is truly a new low. Our 3rd place hitter has a slugging percentage of .221? Come on Bobby, I mean, really. This is just too much, even for you.

  12. Oh man, the one game i can watch during a week and they’re sending out the replacements? This really really sucks! Cole Hamels no-hitter – pretty possible.

  13. Kurkjian was just on ESPN saying that “for the first time” he thinks that Chipper might really retire after this season. He also mentioned something that I hadn’t heard, that Chipper has a problem with his hip that hurts swinging righthanded.

  14. I think there’s some research (but I’m too lazy to look it up now) suggesting that batting order doesn’t have much effect on run production. That said, the old man’s gone completely bonkers putting Melky in the 3rd hole. Diaz has struggled this year, but he’d be my choice especially with his record of raking lefties.

  15. Haha, Infante leading off, Conrad at third, Melky batting third, and Glaus cleanup in front of McCann. Go get ’em Shredder!

  16. Chip and Joe blathering about Melky being a switch hitter so it won’t matter if the Phils start making switches (meaning to RH reliever). Yeah, guys, that’s because he sucks from both sides!

    It’s too early in the season to be this grumpy about baseball.

  17. Lol…some of us have been begging to get Chipper out of the 3 hole forever…but this is *not* really what we had in mind. Why isn’t Hicks starting somewhere today…couldn’t he play first or maybe catch? C’mon, this still isn’t the most intentionally sub-optimal lineup that Bobby could field…he’s got a little bit of room for dis-improvement.

  18. With our only .300 hitter (and for that matter, last .250 hitter)? Of course he’d strike out when he had just one strike left.

  19. Hey, dumb baserunning tricks! With all the lousy hitting, we haven’t had a chance to remember how bad this team is running the bases. Thanks for reminding us, guys!

  20. Normally sending Infante there is a terrible choice–hit to shallow right, Werth has a good arm, McC due up–but with this team that might be the best odds on scoring a run.

  21. Hmmm, the Braves or a National Geographic Special about ICeland.
    tough choice today.

  22. Most impressive that half inning was how Hamels gave up two hits and struck out a batter all the while making only 12 pitches.

  23. The Phillies have a better player than us today at every position except for catcher and shortstop.

  24. Close contact between Infante’s Glove of Stone and the volcanoes whose name looks like someone sneezing in a bowl of alphabet soup.

  25. I’m sorry but “Chase Utley swinging a pink bat” just sounds like nothing so much as porn ad copy.

  26. Why were we playing for 1 run in the top of the freaking 1st? Bobby must have a really really really good gut feeling about Kawakami today.

  27. I was wrong yesterday when I said this, but I’m sure I’m right now:

    Ballgame.

  28. No he definitely got it out of his glove. He took a good 5 steps instead of throwing it home.

  29. What’s the point of McDowell going out to chat with a pitcher who doesn’t speak English? Maybe the translator should go to the mound.

  30. This team is not even good enough to hate. They are doing the worst thing possible – making me just not care about baseball. I never would have thought it possible.

  31. Phils announcers on XM were bashing Melky for not throwing home, guess its a good thing I missed it – I already knew he sucks though, to bad Bobby hasnt figured that out yet

  32. remember Nate’s walkoff that made them 8-5? seems like last season, no way this team is better than .500

  33. This team is not even good enough to hate. They are doing the worst thing possible – making me just not care about baseball. I never would have thought it possible.

    Then there’s two of us.

  34. I just tuned in and saw Melky come up after Prado. I thought it was strange to see Prado down a little further in the lineup. Nope… Bobby’s just on crack.

  35. I too have read that managers, in the long run, can have little or no effect on offensive production by messing with the batting order. And it makes sense–the statistical evidence is pretty certain.

    And yet nobody has ever been so audacious as to bat Melky Cabrera third. I’m not sure the models ever considered that to be an option.

  36. If I did something as stupid as batting Melky Cabrera in the 3 hole at my job I would probably be fired.

  37. TBS is interviewing Terry Pendleton. They’re not asking the only relevant question: How the hell do you still have a job?

    And Bakayaro Kawakami serves up another tater.

  38. Melky strikes me as one of those guys who was so defined by the NYY culture that he can’t excel (nay, just be average) anywhere else. He’s not this bad of a player.

  39. 80 — A friend once joked that to get fired from a state job, you basically have to set fire to the building. On purpose. Perhaps it’s on par with this lineup…

  40. Can we just go back to the Yankees and redo the whole Melky for Vazquez trade. It seems that Melky is better in NY and Vazquez is better in ATL.

  41. Two on, no outs, no runs, and no surprise. Honestly, how did it ever get to be like this?

  42. i realize that baseball isn’t played in a vacuum, so its hard to say that if you change something in an inning, the rest of the inning would play how the same.

    however, to me, the most troubling thing from this game is the braves lack of execution when making outs.

    if prado gets the bunt down or gets the runner over, infante scores from third on glaus’s hit. if kawakami gets the bunt down, then mclouth scores in on infante’s hit, and if diaz doesn’t strike out, a run scores on conrad’s fly to left.

    that to me is what kills me watching this…it isn’t the sheer number of outs the braves make, its how worthless they are.

  43. How about not bunting at all when you know before the game starts that you’ll need 6+ runs to win? If I were a manager I would never practice bunting and never call for a bunt. You get 27 outs…making outs on purpose is stupid. Our problem is that we’ve got 9 guys that are awesome at making outs period.

  44. The volcano sucks more than the Braves. Got stuck in Italy three weeks ago and this week will be a mess again.

  45. Bjork or Melky … pick your poison

    Speaking of the Melkster, he’s on deck just waiting to ground into a DP.

    edit–a gift from Utley or Melky would have delivered the DP

  46. Melky tries to fail (hitting a shouldabeen DP grounder) and can’t do it thanks to a bad bounce. Um, thanks?

  47. @89 – and as soon as you post that…would have taken a double play from McCann in that situation. Anything but a strikeout.

  48. Im getting sick of these guys taking the good pitches and swinging at the crap. Another K looking for McCann

  49. Alright, KK. 8 pitch inning.

    Way to put the “offense” right back out there.

  50. I dont care how bad Mitch Jones is or could be at this level, but I couldnt hate him as much as I do Melky

  51. little league field and Hinske had the only deep fly ball that I can remember

  52. The Braves’ last HR was by Infante in the second inning of the win against Washington, 41 innings ago.

    In fact, the Braves’ only other HR in May were two solo shots by Heyward (May 1 against Houston, Tuesday against Washington).

  53. And the Braves’ 3-spot hitter, BEING SLOWER THAN MCCANN ON ONE LEG – tries to bunt for a single.

  54. And Victorino snuffs any chance that we could tie it by scratching together one run.

  55. If only the Braves can keep it close enough that the Phils bring in Lidge…

  56. Kawakami is on pace to lose about 25 games.

    Chip talking about MVP candidates in May. Moron.

  57. i told everyone on this board way before the season that we’d hate melky as much as we hate francoeur. i’m getting close to being right.

  58. O’Fl. just demonstrated why, as a Braves fan, I’m glad the Phils are on the hook for 5 years/$125m for Howard.

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